I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
