So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
