does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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