Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
so let's talk penis.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Randomize
