so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
