the condom got lost in my hair
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
party gras won. party gras always wins.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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