I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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