my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
nutella sex= disaster
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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