OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Small penises have feelings too.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
