All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
