She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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