a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
