I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
