Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
