Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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