I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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