There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
