I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Nicole vs. Life
either way he was missing a nipple.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
