gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
