were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
