no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
this is an emotional support booty call
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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