and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Randomize
