perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize
