I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
