escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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