I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
