He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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