I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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