You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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