You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
