he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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