are you still at the devil's house?
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Randomize
