Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
