U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
