My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
