I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Well I just put wine in my tea
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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