i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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