Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Randomize