More tranny stories later!
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize