is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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