I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
