My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
