Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
