I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
