I hope mine doesn't look like that
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
