Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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