you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
