I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
