well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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