Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize